Detailed Guide: What to Talk About After Matching on a Dating App

Many guys find it challenging to start and maintain engaging conversations on dating apps. This expanded guide provides in-depth examples and scenarios to help you navigate these interactions more confidently.

What Girls Often Expect to Talk About

1. Common Interests:
   • Example: If her profile mentions yoga, you could say, “I see you’re into yoga! I’ve been thinking about trying it. What got you started, and do you have any tips for beginners?”
2. Personality and Values:
   • Example: “If you could choose three words to describe yourself, what would they be and why?”
3. Goals and Aspirations:
   • Example: “What’s something you’re working towards right now, either personally or professionally?”
4. Humor and Playfulness:
   • Example: “I’m trying to settle a debate with a friend. What’s funnier: dad jokes or puns? I’m team dad jokes all the way!”
5. Daily Life:
   • Example: “How do you usually unwind after a long day? I’m always looking for new relaxation ideas!”
6. Travel and Adventures:
   • Example: “If you could teleport anywhere in the world right now, where would you go and what’s the first thing you’d do there?”
7. Cultural Tastes:
   • Example: “I just finished binge-watching [TV show]. Have you seen it? I’d love to hear your thoughts on the ending!”

Detailed Conversation Starters and Follow-ups

1. Referencing Her Profile: Initial message: “Hey Sarah! I couldn’t help but notice the guitar in your profile pic. Do you play?” If she responds positively:
   • “That’s awesome! How long have you been playing? I’ve always wanted to learn but never got around to it.”
   • “Do you have a favorite genre to play? I’m a big fan of [music genre], but I imagine it might be challenging on guitar.”
   If she says she doesn’t play:
   • “Ah, my mistake! Is it just for decoration then, or do you have a musical family member?”
   • “Well, it definitely makes for a great photo prop! Speaking of hobbies, what do you enjoy doing in your free time?”
2. Asking Open-Ended Questions: Initial message: “Hi Emma! If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would it be and why?” Possible follow-ups:
   • “Interesting choice! What’s the first question you’d ask them?”
   • “That would be an amazing conversation. Speaking of dinners, do you have a favorite cuisine or restaurant in town?”
3. Sharing Something About Yourself: Initial message: “Hey Jessica! I just got back from an amazing hike at [local trail]. The views were incredible! Are you into outdoor activities?” If she says yes:
   • “That’s great! What’s your favorite outdoor spot around here? I’m always looking for new places to explore.”
   • “Have you ever tried [related activity like rock climbing or kayaking]? I’ve been thinking about giving it a shot.”
   If she’s not into outdoor activities:
   • “No worries! Everyone has their own interests. What do you enjoy doing on weekends?”
   • “Fair enough, the outdoors isn’t for everyone. Are you more of a city explorer then? I’d love to hear about your favorite urban spots.”
4. Using Humor (Carefully): Initial message: “Hey Anna! I’m conducting a very scientific study: If you were a breakfast food, what would you be and why? I’m personally a waffle because I’m great with toppings and a bit square. 😄” Possible follow-ups:
   • “Haha, great choice! So, in this breakfast metaphor, what would be your ideal ‘topping’ in a partner?”
   • “That’s a delicious pick! Speaking of food, do you have any favorite brunch spots in town? I’m always on the hunt for a good eggs benedict.”
5. Being Genuine and Respectful: Initial message: “Hi Olivia! I have to say, your profile really caught my attention. Your passion for [interest mentioned in her profile] is really inspiring. What first got you interested in that?” Possible follow-ups:
   • “That’s fascinating! How has [her interest] influenced other aspects of your life?”
   • “It’s always amazing to hear how people discover their passions. Have you ever considered turning it into a career, or do you prefer keeping it as a hobby?”

Remember, the key to a good conversation is to listen (or in this case, read carefully) and respond thoughtfully. Show genuine interest in her responses, ask follow-up questions, and don’t be afraid to share your own experiences or opinions. The goal is to create a natural back-and-forth that feels more like a real-life conversation than an interview.

Lastly, be patient and understanding. Not every match will lead to a great conversation, and that’s okay. Keep practicing, stay positive, and remember that the right connection will feel natural and enjoyable for both parties.